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Summer Pleasures: Watermelon Parties and the Two Sides of Freedom


Posted on March 9, 2018

By Alexandra Kurland


There’s always more to say!  Here’s your bonus material for Podcast #1: Visitors.

You can listen to the audio via the soundcloud player or read it here in the Equiosity Library.  Enjoy!


This has been a cold winter for many of us. That makes it a good time to share with you a story that will remind us all of warm summer days.

Summer means watermelon parties for my horses.  These parties are always a surprise.  As I walk through the barn, bowl in hand, I’ll announce: “It’s party time!”

Watermelon parties are held outside.  That was quick learning on my part.  It’s astounding the amount of happy drool even a few pieces of watermelon can produce.

Robin and Fengur follow me outside.  While I pass out chunks of watermelon, they stand waiting, one on either side of me.  There’s no pushing, no trying to jump the queue, no grumbling at the other horse.  We have a happy time together.  The horses get to enjoy one of their favorite treats, and I get to enjoy their obvious pleasure.  Summer also means sharing an afternoon nap with Robin.  I’ve just come in from mowing the lower pasture.  It’s time for a cool down.  I’m sitting in a chair in the barn aisle, cold drink by my side, computer on my lap, and Robin dozing beside me. Fengur has wandered off to the hay box to snack.  He’ll join us in a little while.

Why am I writing about these simple summer pleasures?  My horses live in a world of yes.  I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what this means.  Living in a world of yes gives me the freedom to enjoy these simple pleasures.  But the freedom isn’t one-sided.  Living in a world of yes gives my horses just as much freedom.

We often think of training in terms of what we need from our animals.  When I walk down the barn aisle, I need you, horse, to move out of my space.  When the door bell rings, I need you, dog, to go sit on your mat.  I’ll teach these things using clicks and treats, but the behaviors are for my benefit more than my animal companions.  The freedom to ask is all on my side.

That’s not how things are in my barn.  It’s set up to maximize choice for the horses.  Doors are left open so they are free to go where they want.  Right now what Robin wants is to nap in the barn aisle.  I couldn’t give Robin this luxury of choice if I hadn’t also given him behaviors that let us share space amiably.

When I walk down the barn aisle, Robin will often pose.  It’s a simple gesture, a slight arch of the neck is all that’s needed.  If he thinks I’m not paying attention, he’ll give a low rumble of a nicker.  I’ll click, and give him a treat.  Often I’ll get a hug in return.  That’s good reinforcement for me.

The pose is a guaranteed way to get attention from me.  If Robin wants to interact, he knows how to cue me. And I am under excellent stimulus control!  That’s how cues should work.  They create a give and take, a back and forth dialog.  They erase hierarchy and create instead the three C’s of clicker training.  Those three C’s lead in turn to the freedom my horses and I enjoy sharing the barn together.

Before I can tell you what the three C’s are, we have to go back a few steps to commands.  It’s not just in horse training that commands rule.  They control most of our interactions from early childhood on.  Commands have a “do it or else” threat backing them up. Parents tell children what to do.  In school it is obey your teachers or face the penalties. In our communities it’s stop at red lights or get a ticket.  Pay your taxes or go to jail. We all know the underlying threat is there.  Stay within the rules and stay safe.  Stray too far over the line and you risk punishment.

This is how we govern ourselves, so it is little wonder that it is also how we interact with our animals.  With both horses and dogs – commands have been the norm.  We tell our dogs to “sit”.  When it is a true command, it is expected that the dog will obey – or else! The command is hierarchical which means it is also unidirectional.  A sergeant gives a command to a private.  The private does what he’s told.  He doesn’t turn things around and give a command back to the sergeant.

We give commands to our horses, to our dogs – never the reverse.  We expect our commands to be obeyed.  We say “sit”, and the dog sits. I tell.  You obey.  Because they are hierarchical, commands exclude dialog.  The conversation is all one-sided.  Commands put us in a frame that keeps us from seeing deep into the intelligence and personality of the individual we’re directing.

Cues are different.  Cues are taught with positive reinforcement.  At first, this sounds like a huge difference, but for many handlers it represents a change in procedure, but not yet of mind set.  The handler may be using treats as reinforcement, but the cues are still taught with an element of coercion.  How can this be?  It’s not until you scratch below the surface, that you’ll begin to understand the ever widening gulf that the use of cues versus commands creates.

To help you see the coercive element, let’s look at how twenty plus years ago we were originally instructed how to teach cues.  You used your shaping skills to get a behavior to happen.  It might be something as simple as touching a target.  Cues evolve out of the shaping process.  The appearance of the target quickly becomes the cue to orient to it.   But this cue is often not fully recognized by a novice handler.   We’re such a verbal species, this handler wants her animal to wait until she says “touch”.  As she understands it, that’s the cue.

So what is the process?  She’s told that when she would bet money that her animal will touch the target when he sees it, she should say “touch” just before she presents it.

Whether she had said anything or not, her learner was going to touch the target. So it’s click and treat for this easy success.  After she’s repeated this a few times, she’s ready to make a discrimination.  Now she’s instructed to present the target, but to say nothing. What does her learner do?  He orients to the target – just as he’s been doing in all the previous trials.  He expects to hear the click and be given a treat, but nothing happens. His person just changed the rules which plunges him into a frustrating puzzle.

He’s in an extinction process.  He’s no longer being reinforced for a behavior that has worked for him in the past.  He’ll go through the normal trajectory of an extinction process.  That means he’ll try harder. He’ll try behaviors that worked in the past, and he’ll become frustrated, anxious, even angry, before he’ll give up for a moment.  In that moment of giving up, his person will say “touch” and present the target again.

She wants him to learn the distinction.  In the presence of the cue perform the behavior – click and treat.  In the absence do nothing.

The problem with this approach is she never taught her learner what “do nothing” looks like.  She stepped from the world of commands into what she thinks of as the kinder world of cues, but she doesn’t really understand what that truly means.  She hasn’t entirely shed the mantle of “do it or else”.  With cues the threat of punishment may not be there, but extinction is still an unpleasant and frustrating experience.  Why is this key on my computer which was just been working now locked up and frozen?!!  Until you can find your way out of the puzzle, you can feel very trapped and helpless.  A good trainer doesn’t leave her learner floundering in an extinction process for very long.  She’s looking for any hesitation that let’s her explain to her learner the on-off nature of cues.


There’s another way to teach this that doesn’t put the learner into this extinction bind.  This other way recognizes that cues create a dialog, a back and forth conversation.  I want my learner to wait for a specific signal before moving towards the target.  Let’s begin by creating a base behavior, a starting point.

For my horses this is the behavior I refer to as: “the grown-ups are talking please don’t interrupt”.   I will reinforce my horse for standing beside me with his head looking forward.  He’ll earn lots of clicks and treats for this behavior.  And he’ll begin to associate a very specific stance that I’m in with this behavior.  When I am standing with my hands folded in front of me, it’s a good bet to try looking straight ahead – click and treat.

In separate sessions he’ll also be reinforced for orienting to a target.  When both behaviors are well established, I’ll combine them.  Now I’ll look for grown-ups.  I’ll fold my hands in front of me, knowing I’ll get the response I’m looking for.  Only now, instead of clicking and reinforcing him, I’ll hold out the target to touch.  Click the quick response and treat.

The cue to touch has just reinforced “grown-ups”.  It’s become a welcome part of the conversation.  If you want to interact with the target, here’s an easy way to get me to produce it – just shift into grown-ups.  That will cue me to lift the target up.  A conversation has begun.

We’re at the very elementary stage of “See spot run”.  I’m teaching my horses the behaviors they can use to communicate with me, and I am showing them how the process works.  You can be heard.  You WILL be heard.  Let’s talk!

The conversation that emerges over time comes from looking more deeply at what cues really are.  We can think of them as a softer form of commands, but that doesn’t oblige us to step out of our hierarchical mindset.  It is still: I give a signal.  You – my animal companion – respond.  Click and treat.  Diagram this out.  The arrows all point in one direction.

Peel another layer of understanding about how cues work and you come to this:
It isn’t just that cues are taught with positive reinforcement.  Cues can be given by anyone or anything.  A curtain going up cues an actor to begin speaking his lines.  We would never say the curtain commanded the actor.

If cues can be given by anyone or anything, that means they are not hierarchical.  We cue our animals, and they cue us.  Cues create a back and forth exchange.  They lead to conversation – to a real listening to our animals.  We adjust our behavior based on their response.  Cues lead to the three C’s of clicker training: communication, choice, and connection.  And in my barn that in turn creates opportunities for more freedom.  It means doors can be left open.  It means I can have watermelon parties and sit with my horses while we both enjoy the afternoon breeze through the barn aisle.

Let’s parse this some more.

The mindset that commands create is very much centered around stopping behavior. Other training options don’t make sense.  “They don’t work.”

Cue-based training makes it easier for you to see your horse’s behavior as communication, as a bid for attention.  That makes it easier for you to look for solutions that satisfy his needs.

Let’s see how these differences play out in a typical boarding barn scenario.  Your horse is hungry.  His initial whicker has been ignored. In frustration he’s escalated into banging on his stall door.  His human caretakers see this as “demanding” hay.  In a command-based frame demanding hay equal rebellious behavior which can’t be tolerated.  The behavior must be stopped.

Within this frame the only training options you can think of are those centered around stopping the unwanted behavior.  Other options don’t make sense and won’t work.  The command-based frame narrows your field of view.  It’s as though you have a tight beam focused on the problem behavior.  Everything within that beam is crystal clear, but everything outside the beam might as well not exist.  You can’t even begin to think about other solutions.  You are targeted on the unwanted behavior.  Banging on the stall door must be addressed and addressed directly.


Now let’s look at the contrast that a cue-based frame creates.  Your horse is hungry.  His initial whicker to you is noticed and responded to.  You appreciate his alerting you to the lack of hay.  You have read how important gut fill is in preventing ulcers.  You attend to your horse’s needs.  Within this frame many options become available including hanging a slow feeder in his stall so he doesn’t have to become anxious about his hay.

Which training options make sense will depend upon which frame you are in.  If you are a teacher and you want your instructions to be effective, you need to help your students open a frame that matches what you are trying to teach.

In her presentations Dr. Susan Friedman uses a slide that illustrates the hierarchy of behavior change procedures beginning with the most positive, least intrusive procedures.

You begin by looking at health and nutritional considerations and then move to antecedent arrangements.  Hanging a hay net for our hungry horse would fit in here. Her slide pictures a car moving along a highway.  As you begin to approach more invasive procedures, there are speed bumps blocking the way.  They are there to slow you down, to make you think about other approaches before you bring in the heavy guns of positive punishment.  The hierarchy doesn’t exclude positive punishment as a possible solution, but it does say you would use this only when everything else has first been tried.

This hierarchy makes sense when you are looking at behavior from a cue-based perspective.  From a command-based frame, the car enters not at the bottom of the roadway, but at the top.

The first intervention is positive punishment.  The barriers are still there, but now they act to keep you from seeing other options.  It is only when punishment fails, that you are dragged, kicking and screaming, to consider other ways of changing behavior.  I’ve heard these stories so many times from people who are attending their first clicker training clinic.  They’ve been brought there by “that horse” – the one who challenges everything they thought they knew about training.  Nothing else worked, but then they tried, as a last resort, a bit of clicker training and everything changed!  So here they are, ready to learn more.


They don’t yet know what an exciting world they are entering.  Everything they have thought about training is about to be turned truly upside down and inside out.  That’s all right.  They have the fun of watermelon parties ahead of them.

If you want to learn more about living in a world of yes and the freedom that creates for both you and your animal companions, visit and for more articles, books and DVDS by Alexandra Kurland. There you will find detailed instructions for introducing your horse to clicker training.

Coming Soon:  “Tap Root Behaviors”: Your bonus material for Podcast #2:” The Companions of our Heart”.

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